Have you ever wondered why many marriages fail?
You’re probably thinking age, money and infidelity are at the top of the list. While those issues do play a part, it goes much deeper than that, and it actually happens before couples say, “I Do”.
All couples enter marriage with expectations, and many times those expectations are the polar opposite of their spouse-to-be!
So why is that?
It’s because our expectations have much to do with the environment we were raised in; gender roles being a huge influence. And even though you would think these differences would be clear before getting married, it usually comes to light after crossing the threshold.
And it’s these expectations or assumptions that can create the lies we believe about marriage. Today, it’s my job to debunk them.
MYTH #1- LOVE IS ALL WE NEED
Although love is a very important part, a healthy marriage needs much more to tackle the challenges couples face in their life together.
Sometimes newly married couples believe this myth because they desire a fairy tale type relationship, and, who could blame them? The problem is it’s just not realistic. The key to building a strong foundation for your marriage is to add patience, compromise and trust.
MYTH #2- HE/SHE COMPLETES ME
I always think of the Jerry McGuire movie when I hear this one.
So, here’s the problem with myth #2. It’s impossible for one person to “complete” the other. A successful marriage requires a continual giving of ourselves to our spouse. And if we’re not a complete person before marriage, we won’t have enough of ourselves to give our partner in marriage.
MYTH #3- WE SEE EYE TO EYE ALREADY, SO COMMUNICATION WON’T BE AN ISSUE
Many couples are very compatible before marriage. Some even have a magical, non-verbal way of communicating. But, this doesn’t mean they’ll always be able to see eye-to-eye.
Once again, expectations play a big part here. And after a couple is married, they will face new and at times difficult challenges in their life together which will put their communication skills to the test.
The bottom line here is to remember to go into your marriage with an open heart and an open mind. Leave your assumptions and expectations at the door. Because marriage changes everything!
I’d love to get your thoughts on this topic! If you’re going to be married, how do you envision your life together? And if you’re already married, what one expectation did you have that didn’t turn out the way you thought it would? Get the conversation started by commenting below!